When you focus upon lack in an attitude of complaining, you establish a vibrational point of attraction that then gives you access only to more thoughts of complaint. Your deliberate effort to tell a new story will establish a new pattern of thought, providing you with a new point of attraction from your present, about your past, and into your future. The simple effort of looking for positive aspects will set a new vibrational tone that will begin the immediate attraction of thoughts, people, circumstances, and things that are pleasing to you.
— Abraham

http://trainradio.blogspot.com/

He interviewed me for approximately one hour on Canadian radio. We discussed mainly life coaching and corporate coaching, how it works and the impact it can have on corporate culture.
If you would like to hear and see Denis then he has done a very interesting and slightly controversial video which can be seen here on you Tube

Personally I agree with everything he says.

My interview will be available shortly,
Warmest
Gerard

It’s very interesting for the first few minutes after losing the phone and after the taxi disappeared over the horizon !!! I felt a combination of anger and loss.
However I quickly reframed that ( thank goodness I know these coaching techniques) and actually now I am feeling a huge sense of relief.
Not only can I not telephone anyone ( which is a little bit frustrating) but more importantly no one can call me
And I realized that actually, in the back of your mind all the time when you are carrying your phone you are always aware that it can go off at any time and suddenly you are at people’s beck and call, involved in problems, or having to deal with some situation.
For me, today that has been completely removed, and I have to say, it feels great.
So, although I will probably have to claim on my insurance and set about getting a new phone, I fully intend to enjoy the short time without one. It really is a tremendous relief.

The walks are run by Andy who has a business called ” Jurassic Jaunts” http://www.jurassicjaunts.co.uk/
I’ve known Andy for many years and he is an exceptional guy. A wonderful leader, he gives up his time to lead groups on walks every weekend along the Jurassic Coast.
Walks like this I find really beneficial, it gives me a chance to think very clearly about many things..
It helped me to plan the launch of “Colour Coaching” our new Division to help Women Coaches to build lots of New Clients.
Here is an idea of what the site will look like when it’s finished. This is only the front page right now

http://most-important.com/

Although, one of the things that is bothering me right now is the numbers. We are very deliberately limiting the amount of people that we will allow to train to only 10 per course.and we only plan on running two or possibly three courses this year. So, I know a lot of people are going to be disappointed.
But, I don’t know what else to do, it is so important to me that we keep the quality of the training to a huge standard.
As indeed is everything we do at Noble Manhattan.
Next week the walk is around Corfe Castle. Looking forward to that
Bye for now
Gerard

WOW what an adventure trip. I arrived back on Sunday night having spent the last 16 days travelling around Eastern Europe on my motorbike.

Went through the following countries

However it has made me realise that one trip isn’t enough I now need to plan for more

Here are our bikes parked outside our Frankfurt hotel at the end of our first long day of riding . Mine is the white Honda on the right-hand side (the mighty Honda !!)

I will upload some photographs and journey details in my next post

Warmest

Success Requires a Willingness to Act

If you want to be successful, you can start at anytime.
But you must start.

Don’t make the mistake of not doing anything
because you can only do a little.
Do what you can do.

It will always be your attitude
at the beginning of any difficult task which,
more than anything else, will affect its successful outcome.

To be aware of what you want and not go after it,
to spend years wondering if something could have materialized,
and never knowing if it could have been,
is a tragic waste of your life.
The worst thing you can do is not to try.

To reach a port, you must sail.
You must sail, not lie at anchor.
You must sail off in the direction of your dreams, not drift.

A journey of a thousand miles, begins with one step.

Max Steingart ©2002

Most people have a hard time delegating, or even wanting to delegate, because you have been justifying your existence through your hard work, and you equate success with struggle; you equate results with struggle. And so, you sort of wear your struggle like a badge of honor. And all of that is opposite of allowing the Well-being. The only thing that ever matters in success or achievement is your achieving the things that you want to achieve. So if you are setting standards and you’re feeling uncomfortable about the standards that you’ve set, tweak the standards back a little bit. Ratchet it back a notch. Give yourself a break. Give yourself the benefit of the doubt. Lighten up. Be easier. Go slower. Take it easy. Have more fun. Love yourself more. Laugh more. Appreciate more. All is well. You can’t get it wrong. You never get it done.

The Law of Attraction says: that which is like unto itself, is drawn. And  so, the essence of whatever you give your attention to is  unfolding in your experience.

Therefore, there is nothing that you cannot be, do, or have. This is Law.

 The last week has been just so jampacked !! From the moment the plane landed on Monday afternoon it has been meeting after meeting briefing after briefing. We did a very large introduction to coaching event here in Bucharest and had some amazing people.

Then we flew to the northern city of Iasi in Moldova. This was a first for me and I had been looking forward to it quite a lot. I was not disappointed, the city is so incredibly beautiful with dozens of magnificent churches , Museum’s, palaces etc

We stayed at the Ramada hotel and did another ” Introduction to Coaching” event.

What an eye-opener !!! We had so many people arrive we didn’t have enough chairs or space and had to do some rearranging ( very quickly) the response to what we are offering is just magnificent.

So it looks as if I shall have to go back to Iasi on a regular basis.

 Then we flew straight back to Bucharest just as a large three-day Mind Body and Spirit exhibition started. We had a large exhibition stand there and have about 12 of our team helping.

I ran a workshop on Friday afternoon on ” Spiritual Coaching” the room was full.

This week we also had our first coaching support group meeting in the city of Timisioara (29 people came to that first meeting) this is run by our new coaching support leader Vali, what a great job he has done.

 I have to say huge thanks to our country head here in Romania, Valerica Cojucaru , she is doing a magnificent job.

Where do we find these incredible people ???

 Well, I have to go now to catch my plane to Warsaw.

Lots of love

Gerard

 (The question that is the gateway to spiritual enlightenment)

 Having been a coach for many years, in addition to having been involved in the training of at least 5000 coaches worldwide, I have come to the conclusion that one of the greatest skills that we, as coaches, possess and need to perfect is the ‘art of the question’. In fact, one could say that another definition of a coach is Master Questioner.

 It is important to remember that the quality of our life is determined by the quality of questions we ask ourselves.  Some people ask themselves very mediocre questions indeed.  For example, “What time shall we go to down the pub?”  Others look at someone who has achieved great things and ask themselves “Why not me?”.  It is similar to the difference between “I can’t afford it” and “How can I afford it?”As coaches we have two responsibilities towards our client.  The first is to provide them with a first-class coaching experience through the effective use of questioning skills.  The second is to educate them in the techniques and benefits of self-questioning, helping them to realise the importance of regularly asking key questions.

 Of course when it comes to asking questions we can get very sophisticated and clever indeed.  We can use questions with suppositions and presuppositions.  We can use open and closed questions, we can get involved in nested loops, we can use hidden questions and open questions and in fact we can make ourselves feel and look very clever indeed.

 However I learned a long time ago the importance of simplicity and it is my opinion that the greatest coaching question of all is “Who am I?”

 This question is very often ignored.  Why? Because it is easy to ignore; it can take us on an uncomfortable journey and one we might prefer to avoid.  And yet it is essential if we wish to understand our core, the real person, the immutable, incorruptible and authentic ‘me’.  The “me” we are really meant to be.

 This question is the one that helps people come to a deep and satisfying realization of who they really are. So this is one of the key questions that we must teach our clients to ask of themselves on a regular basis. ‘Who am I?’ Again and again.

 True happiness and fulfilment in life is only achieved when our actions and goals are congruent with our core values. Yet the sad truth is most of us do not really know what our core values are.  Unfortunately we take on board the values of others, the values that are impressed upon us by the media that constantly bombards us, and the values of the people we work with and the companies we work for.  It is rare that the values that we attach to ourselves are our true values. The inner conflict that this creates is one of the underlying causes for the level of unhappiness and depression in today’s society.

 You see our values are in fact the mirror of who we really are yet few of us look deep enough into the mirror to see the truth.  Many thousand years ago there was a word written above a doorway in ancient Greece. The word was “ Knosti” and it was written above the doorway of the Delphic oracle.  It is as true today as it ever was those thousands of years ago.  It simply means “ know thyself”

 There is an old adage that says that if you don’t know where you’re coming from then you don’t know where you’re going.  The same is true here, if you don’t know who you really are how can you possibly know what you really want out of life, what is truly important and how do you know where you are headed.  I learned a long time ago that most people don’t really know what they want in life, but are prepared to go through hell to get it !!!

 Being able to answer the question “Who am I?” with clarity and honesty will start the process that will make a profound change in the direction your life takes.  This in turn will affect those close to you; your family, your friends, and your work. The way to make a real change in the world today is simply to do it one person, one mind at a time.  Start with the person who is closest to you – yourself of course!

                                        HOW DO I ASK THE QUESTION?

 It is important that when we ask ourselves the question “Who am I?” we allow time for the answers to come.  The truth may have to percolate up through a number of layers, and this takes time.  You may have to ask yourself this question a number of times.  For example, you may ask “Who am I?” and the answer may come back ‘I am a teacher’, ‘I am an electrician’, ‘I am a solicitor’ etc. The truth is you are none of these things. You see you are not what you do! You are far more than that.

So when you ask yourself the question “Who am I?” and you get an answer, you may then need to ask again “and who else am I?” And again “Who else am I?”.

 It is morally essential that we eventually find out who we are.  So many of us wander through life in a kind of emotional and spiritual amnesia, deadening our response to life by producing images of ourselves that are far from the truth.

 I recommend that when we engage in this important process that we do it in a place of solitude and stillness in order that we can be truly present for the answer.  We cannot really experience anything without being present with it.  True presence requires that we be attentive to what is happening in the here and now.  It is our responsibility to be aware.

 EXERCISES

 Imagine that you have just come back from a visit to your doctor where you have been informed that you have an incurable disease and only six months to live.  However, during these 6 months you will be perfectly healthy, fit and active.  Now write down what you would do, who you would see, where you would go and, very important, who you would spend your time with – and why.  Would you change any aspect of your life right now?  Would you continue to work in your job/career?  If not, why not?

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 Explanation:  This should very clearly point you in the direction of what is important or even essential in your life.  It is so easy to procrastinate but you need to attend to these things right now.  It is obvious that these things are extremely important to you, so you should endeavour to achieve them as soon as possible – as a matter of urgency.

  WHO AM I AT WORK?

 It amazes me when I see the leaders of major companies like BAT (British American Tobacco) being hailed by the business community worldwide as paragons, and real exemplars of how business should be run.  Yet, there are tens of thousands of people dying every month around the world because of their product.  Society is putting on pedestals men and women who create products that kill, purely for profit.  I sometimes wonder if the inmates have taken over the asylum!

 However, what price has been paid by these decision-making men and women?

Like so many others in similar scenarios being played out in corporations all around the world, these individuals are subjugating their own values for those of the company they work for.  If only they would ask themselves “Who am I?” we might see a profound and radical change in the thinking of these leaders. 

 I have found that when I have worked with men and women in these positions and supported them in answering my question “Who are you?” I have enjoyed watching them travel slowly towards a true realisation of self.  It is at this point that they have started to make a change, to really make a difference within their companies.  Making and carrying out decisions that are based on power rather than force.  Making a positive difference in the lives of the employees and thousands of customers of that corporation.

 Much is said about corporate social responsibility; it is a phrase that is bandied about with gay abandon and in some cases a solomneous that belies the real truth, which is that most people follow and adopt the company culture, ethics, morals and values rather than expressing their own thoughts. This leads them to do things that are not congruent with their own core values.  

 Therefor there is a great need for all of us to get back in touch with our core values, because the truth is that in most of us these are highly commendable.  It ‘s just a case of getting back there and re-remembering who we are.

 DO I EVEN KNOW WHO I AM?

 If we are not sure of who we are right now then how much more difficult it is to try and work out who we really want to be in the future.  Especially as the media does such a fantastic job of indoctrinating us into believing what we really should be.  From advertisements on television we know we should all be young, slim, good-looking, tanned, without spots or glasses.  From numerous magazines we learn that by paying a lot more attention to ourselves and spending lots of our hard earned money (and in some cases, yet to be earned money) we can really make ourselves young, sexually desirable, good-looking, and successful.

 The result of this is that we end up setting goals for ourselves that have actually been foisted on us. Not ones that are congruent with or even based on our own true core values.

 IN CONCLUSION

 For many years I believed one of the greatest coaching questions of all was “What do you want?”.  This question can be asked in so many ways, you can come at it from so many angles and for several years I believed this was the question of questions.

However, long ago I realised that for some of the reasons stated above this is not the great question it ought to be because, as we have seen, we don’t really know what we want at all. 

 I now know with a deep and profound sense of knowing, that there is a higher question, a more important question, a question that reaches deep down to the core. That question is “Who am I”??

 You see coaching is about performing at your best through the individual and private assistance of someone who will challenge stimulate and guide you to keep growing. Essentially it is about helping you to reach self actualisation – a point at which you not only truly know yourself but within this knowledge possess a feeling of comfort with and understanding of the person you discover.

 Coaching (or if we don’t have a coach, self-coaching) is indispensable if we want to really reach our full potential, to be all that we can be, to truly reach a point of self transcendence.

 Gerard O’Donovan
Managing Director
Noble Manhattan Coaching
CEO – IIC (International Institute of Coaching)
www.noble-manhattan.com
gerard@noble-manhattan.com
++44(0)1305 769411
www.internationalinstituteofcoaching.com